"Where's the barber who worked on the next chair?" asked the old customer as he was getting a shave.



Hadn't you heard about Bill? said the barber. It was a very sad case.



He grew nervous and despondent over poor business, and one day when a customer said he didn't care for a massage he suddenly went out of his mind and slashed the customer's throat. He is in the asylum for the criminal insane now. Will you be having a massage, sir?



Sure, go ahead! said the customer.

Mulla Nasruddin was applying for a job.



"Does the company pay for my hospitalization?" he asked.



"No, you pay for it," the personnel director said. "We take it out of your salary each month."



"The last place I worked, they paid for it," said the Mulla.



"That's unusual," the personnel man said. "How much vacation did you get?"



"Six weeks," replied the Mulla.



"Did you get a bonus?" the personnel man asked.



"Yes," said the Mulla. "Not only that, they gave us an annual bonus, sent us a turkey on Thanksgiving, gave us the use of a company car and threw a big barbecue for us each year."



"Why did you leave?" asked the personnel director.



"They went busted," said Nasruddin.

Banta, an eager young man entered his prospective boss's office for an interview.



"One thing our company is very particular about is cleanliness. I hope you wiped your shoe on the door mat while coming in?" said the boss.



"Yes sir," Banta replied promptly.



The boss continued, "One more thing we're very particular about is honesty. There is no door mat outside!"

Wedding speech from modern girl to her in laws:



My dear new family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new house...



Firstly I must tell you that my presence here should not change your life routines...



Those who used to do the laundry must keep on doing it... Those cooking must keep cooking... Those cleaning must keep cleaning... I'll not disturb anybody's routine...



So far as I'm concerned, I'm here only to:

Eat BUN,

Have FUN and

Entertain your SON!!!

12 reasons why I chose Business as profession:
1. I hate sleeping.
2. I have enjoyed my life in childhood.
3. I can't Live without Tension.
4. I wanted 2 have a disturbed life.
5. I believe in Geeta "karm karo fal ki chinta mat karo".
6. I wanted 2 take revenge on myself.
7. I love dreaming about, delivery, payments, orders.
8. I like spending time with staff, customer, govt babu than family, friends.
9. I love giving bribe.
10. I love 2 work on holidays.
11. I can't live without mobile hooked on my ears even in the bathroom.

and the best one
12. I love begging for payments.