Teacher: Kaun si chidiya sabse fast urti hai...........??
Student: Mam, Haathi !!
Teacher: Nalayak!!! Tera baap kya karta hai.......??
Student: Ji woh Al Qaida mein aatankwadi ka kaam karte hai !!!
Teacher: Shabash beta! Likho bacchon, answer likho, HAATHI.
Killer English by Teachers:
PT Teacher: You three of you, stand together separately.
Geography Teacher: Will you hang that map or else I'll hang myself.
Principal: Tomorrow call your parents, especially Mother and Father.
And the terrific one:
English Teacher: Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when I'm in the class!
Question: Why Ambulance is White in Colour? (15 marks)
Ans: Ambulance has Oxygen cylinder.
Oxygen is a Gas, and Gas is used 4 cooking Food.
Food is source of Vitamins, and we get Vit-D from the Sun.
Sun produces Light; and Light comes from bulbs. Small Bulbs are used to decorate Christmas tree... Christmas means Gifts, and Gifts are given by Santa.
Santa lives in North Pole, and North Pole is the house of Polar Bears.
Polar Bears are White... That's why Ambulance is White...
Do not play with Engineering students feelings. We can write anything for good marks.
Cricket is getting excited day by day with the introduction of IPL and T20...
Same rules should be applied in Exams too!
1. Exams Timing Should Be Reduced To One Hour.
2. Power Play - No Invigilator In Exam Hall For 1st 15 mins.
3. Cheer Leaders - To Dance After Every Right Answer Written.
4. Strategic Time-Out - Time For Students For Discussion.
5. Super Over - Chance For Students To Form Their Own Question.
Best wishes & best of luck for exams.
When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their "arguments" were very common.
One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor.
The professor, in his arrogance, said, "Mr Gandhi: you do not understand... a pig and a bird do not sit together to eat."
Gandhi replies, "You do not worry professor, I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table.
Mr. Peters, green of rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions.
Then, Mr. Peters asked him the following question, "Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money; which one will you take?" Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, "The one with the money, of course."
Mr. Peters, smiling, said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom, don't you think?"
"Each one take what one doesn't have", responded Gandhi indifferently.
Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word "idiot" and gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down.
A few minutes later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade."