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Kids Jokes on Lipy - Page 5


Dad to son: When I beat you how do you control your anger?



Son: I start cleaning toilet.

Dad: How does that satisfy you?



Son: I clean it with your toothbrush.



The group had surrounded a dog. Concerned the boys were hurting the dog, the reverend went over and asked, "What are you doing with that dog?"



One of the boys replied, "This dog is just an old neighborhood stray. We all want him, but only one of us can take him home. So we've decided that whichever one of us can tell the biggest lie will get to keep the dog."



The reverend was taken aback, "You boys shouldn't be having a contest telling lies!" he exclaimed.



He then launched into a 10-minute sermon against lying, beginning, "Don't you boys know it's a sin to lie?" and ending with, "Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie."



There was dead silence for about a minute. Just as the reverend was beginning to think he'd gotten through to them, the smallest boy gave a deep sigh and said, "All right, give him the dog."


Granddaughter is sitting on Grandpa's lap as he reads the paper not paying any attention to her. So she starts studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets up the nerve and rubs her fingers over the wrinkles and then over her own face and looks more puzzled.



She finally asks, "Grandpa, did God make you?"



'He sure did honey, a long long time ago", he replied.



"Well, did God make me?` she asked.



"Yes He did, and that wasn't too long ago," he answered.



She thought for a minute and then said, "Wow! He's sure doing a lot better job these days isn't He?"

Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
Lipy: Don't bite any.


One day, a baby camel and its father had a conversation.



Baby Camel: Dad, why do we have humps on our backs?



Father Camel: Well, son, our humps contain the fat necessary to sustain us though all the days when we're out in the desert.



Baby Camel: Oh, okay. Dad, why do we have long eyelashes?



Father Camel: They're to protect our eyes from the sandstorms which rage in the desert.



Baby Camel: I get it now. Dad, why do we have big padded feet?



Father Camel: Because the sand in the desert is very soft and we need big feet so that we can walk on the sand without sinking.



Baby Camel: Thanks, Dad. So what are we doing in London Zoo?

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